When was the last time you were bored? Last week, I caught a fragment of a radio show exploring the connection between boredom and imagination. Instantly, I was transported from the boredom of driving into the possibilities the topic introduced in my mind. Of course, today I cannot find the radio show to link to for you. Sorry/not sorry.
Between the devices we carry around, the endless streaming services, sports on demand, social media and casinos in many neighborhoods, there is never a reason to NOT be entertained. We can easily avoid boredom in our attention-seeking world. But is it good for us to avoid being bored?
Boredom is the path into introspection or self-reflection. It is the space where we can reset our attention to more health-full things, make important decisions, and allow our anxious nervous energy to relax. Turns out, boredom is necessary for good mental health. Really good for us.
The world economy, however, would like to have our attention, please and thank you very much. The political class would like it too — outrage and tribal loyalty are reliable currencies, and a citizen busy being furious is a citizen too rattled to reflect. When we are focused “out there” on stories or opinions or religion or how the world works, we neglect ourselves and the need for introspection.
I used to offer coaching services to small business owners and women who were making transitions. One of my clients came to me regularly to talk about the challenges in her life. We would agree on a topic for introspection or a small action she would commit to. The next week, she would report that she hadn’t done it. After six weeks or so, I asked about this avoidance as she left her session. Her reply has stuck with me for 20 years. She said, “I don’t find myself very interesting.”
I knew in that instant I could not help her, no matter how many coaching sessions we had. Lacking any curiosity about herself, she was focused “out there”—trying to create change where she had no agency to do so: in other people.
It’s a trap many of us fall into, and not only one client at a time. We pour our attention into people we cannot change, parties we cannot reform from our living rooms, and strangers on screens we will never meet. Meanwhile, the one life we can shape sits unattended.
When our attention is focused “out there” through our voracious appetite to be entertained (and avoiding boredom), we miss the opportunity to reflect and to create the stories about ourselves and our lives that enrich and enliven our existence.
This is why I love to sit in my chair, looking out the windows into my yard each morning. I can be still and ponder the meaning of life and my role in the world. It’s not exactly boredom, but it is space—and feeling spacious. No need to entertain me when I can direct my own attention to what matters most.
Where will you find some boredom today? I hope you relish it.